Baby Grayson is here!!!

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Week 38 & 39

So I’m really bad. I’m behind on my blogging so I did both Week 39 and Week 38 in one post. Week 40 just started yesterday, as my due date was June 27^th. Any day now baby Grayson. I cannot believe we are at this point already. Well, actually I can, but it is still mind blowing. I cannot wait!! BTW, aparently I wore basically the same outfit Week 38 & 39. As you can see... things are really not fitting if I am wearing the same thing routinely!

Week 39

Major Developments: Baby is continuing to accumulate fat which will help him regulate his body temperature. He’s also working on his layers of skin

Size of Baby:  Weight of a mini watermelon

Week 39 was another week of prep for the baby. We have pretty much gotten everything taken care of at this point. Over the weekend we packed baby Grayson’s hospital bag. We picked out 4 different outfits just in case he doesn’t fit in one. We also threw in a 4^th of July shirt just in case he goes that long. He better not!! I’m really hoping to take him home in this super cute brown outfit we have for him. We’ll see what fits him best. I put together a bag of cloth diapers for the hospital and got all of the other misc items ready that he will need. I’m hoping to put the cloth diapers on him right away and not have any plastic diapers wasted at the hospital. I packed my hospital bag last night. There isn’t nearly as many items in my bag as there are in his. Just clothes and some huge pads basically. I haven’t purchased pads probably in 10 years. I stood there staring at them for the longest time because I didn’t even know what to buy. It was hilarious. I’ve also packed myself a lot of snacks for labor and lotion for massages. Eric has been working on a play list all week for labor. He’s a cutie. We have both been reading a book on husband coached labor, which will help us if I am strong enough to do the labor without an epidural. The book is really interesting and very helpful I think.

I gave up on finishing any more diapers before Grayson gets here. Bre came over to help me the other day and I just wanted to cry finishing them. I only had 4 left to do but I just didn’t have the strength to do it. I’m going to save the last 4 for after birth. I was way too moody to deal with it. I just kept saying I hate you diapers I hate you! Bre got to see my pregnancy hormone wrath at its finest. Luckily, I was able to hold the tears back.

I stopped lifting weights at the gym about a week and a half ago. Since then, I have just been walking on the tredmill or getting on the bike. I don’t have the strength to lift weights any more. I will resume after it is safe after delivery. I have been walking my butt off all week. Eric and I have been getting up early in the morning to walk before work, then I walk at the gym, then we walk before bed. We are hoping that this will encourage little baby to come into this world. I’ve been hearing so many different things about getting yourself to go into labor naturally that I’m just about sick of it. I guess it doesn’t hurt to try walking anyways. I’ve also been doing a lot of squats and yoga too. These are things that are recommended to get the head into position. The squats and yoga are also things that I can do while I’m in labor to help relieve the pain so it is good practice.

I’m almost to my wits end with everything though. Everyone around me seems to be an expert at pregnancy and going into labor. Everyone has recommendations and their story to tell. I know they are just excited but I just want to learn on my own. It’s really excessive. I can’t walk down the hall at work without being pestered to death about my pregnancy. One day last week it took me 30 mins to go to the breakroom, warm my lunch up, and get back to my desk to eat. Crazy!! I’ve also felt a lot of pressure about getting induced, which is something that I really do not want to do. This is something that I really don’t need added stress over. Ugh! My doctor does not want to induce until 41 weeks because it is healthier for me and the baby. I am following the doctor’s orders. Baby Grayson will come when he wants to come. He can only arrive on his schedule, not someone else’s. I’m happy to have him whenever he is ready. I do not feel miserable at all other than the annoying things that happen day to day. My body feels fine; my mind is just going crazy. We are all just really excited for him to finally show his face.

This weekend my mom, Bre, Megan, and I went to get mani pedis. I really needed to get some primping done before our little bundle of job arrived. I got my nails painted with that gel stuff that lasts a long time so that my nails can be all nice in my pictures after delivery. Who wants to look at my never ending claws in pictures? Not me. I also got a yellow pedicure with little G’s on the toes. Hopefully baby notices them on his way out!! I got them just for him. Hehe. It was nice to go and have that done. I rarely go for pedicures. We all know I couldn’t have reached my toes to paint them even if I tried. Those bad boys are just way too difficult to reach at this point.

This weekend we also went on our last date as a family of two. We went to see a movie and had dinner at Postinos. We rarely go to the movies and don’t go out to eat often so it was really nice. Except for when I got super hungry and weak while we were waiting for a table. Not so feel good. I found the most delicious lemonade on the planet that night. Cucumber Honey Lemonade. OMG! It was to die for! The next time we go on a date will either be with all three of us or Grayson will be baby sat for whoever wants to fight over him. I’ll probably just toss him up in the air and see who snatches him out of the air first. He he. They are all so excited.

I went to the doctor at the beginning of week 39 for my exam. They told me I was not dilated at all and not effaced. It was super disappointing to hear this. They told me it would probably be another 2 weeks (one week to the due date and then 1 week late). I was dreading telling my family because I knew they wanted him here asap. I just cried in the car on the way to work after hearing that. Partly due to my hormones, partly because I was hoping for progress and partly due to the dread of having to explain that I was going to be late. That is why we really started kicking up the walking. I went to the doctor’s office for another visit yesterday, which was my due date and the beginning of week 40, for another exam. This time I was 3-4 CM dilated and 50% effaced!!! I was so relieved to hear that. My doctor now thinks that I will probably not make it to my next appointment, which is Tuesday the 2^nd.  He thinks I will probably go into labor naturally before or during the weekend. It was such good news to hear. If I go until Tuesday, he is going to do a non-stress test on the baby as well as an ultrasound to double check the fluids. If at that point everything is still looking good he will let me make the decision to induce or to let baby go into week 42. Hopefully we don’t get to that point.

I have been having cramps lately, which is good I guess. I also lost my mucus plug (gross I know). These are both signs that my body is prepping for labor but don’t necessarily mean I’m going to go into labor right away, which is what I’m trying to make perfectly clear to people. I don’t need anyone getting their hopes up. I’m really hoping to go into labor in the next day or two though. I have not felt any contractions yet, or at least I don’t think so. The closest thing to a contraction I have felt was last night. I was really not feeling hot last night until I laid down for bed. I had it in my head that I was totally going to go into labor based off how I felt. I really feel like I am ready mentally. I bet once I go into labor I’ll probably freak out a little but I think I’m pretty much good to go. I just want to see my little critter already. I can’t even believe that this is going to happen. Eric and I are ready to go through this labor together and then bring our happy little boy home. Is it time yet???? Ugh! His room is all ready for him, the car seats are in the cars, and the ferrets are ready with their greeting banner.

Week 38

Major Developments: Baby has a firm grasp and organs have matured

Size of Baby:  Length of a Leek about 19 inches

Week 38 was pretty uneventful. I went to the doctor thinking that I was going to have an exam done but they decided to push it back to week 39. I was disappointed but figured that I hadn’t really made much progress. I haven’t felt much of anything as far as contractions. We did end up telling our doctor the baby’s name that visit though. Our Doctor’s name is Grayson as well. We knew the minute he found out the name of our baby it would go straight to his head because he is funny like that. He was super excited! He also loved the middle name Yorke for the same reasons we had chosen that name. What a cool name: Grayson Yorke. I love it so much.

Father’s day was during week 38. Of course, we did not celebrate it, other than for our own fathers. We decided to have a big BBQ with my family and his. It was a Mediterranean themed BBQ and we went allll out. We made yogurt rosemary chicken Kabobs and pork tenderloin kabobs as well. Plus we had a Greek cucumber salad and Greek rice. Then we got super fancy and made Baklava from scratch. Everything turned out delicious. Baby Grayson sure loves him some Bakalava.

We had planned on getting a lot done that weekend to prepare for the baby. We did quite a bit of organization but it still feels like we are out of order. We are going to need a bigger house in no time. We are running out of room. Poor baby Grayson is going to need more room to play. I’m sure the ferrets wouldn’t mind either.

Weeks 37

Major Developments: Lungs are mature enough to be born, baby might have full head of hair (yeah right)

Size of baby: Length of Stalk of Swiss chard. About 19 inches long

The countdown continues. Baby Grayson’s arrival is quickly approaching and I don’t think I’m ready yet. Eeek! He has to hang in there until my diapers are finished. Then he is free to come. Those diapers are sure keeping me busy!!

So this week, Eric surprised me with a pair of red Tom’s and flowers. It was super sweet of him. I was really excited for the shoes because they are precious – and red. I want to get matching baby toms for Grayson. How cute. Friday, I was supposed to be working on my diapers but I decided that I wanted to take Eric on a date instead. I figured, we only have a few more weekends so we should take advantage of it. We cook so much at home we rarely end up going out to dinner. It has been nice to go out the past 2 weekends. I think we’ll probably only have time to squeeze in one more date as a family of 2 before Grayson comes. Eek!!! I had to exchange my shoes for a smaller size so we looked at the baby Tom’s too. They are so freaking cute!!! I can hardly stand it! I can’t wait to get him a pair. My feet are so dang swollen that I could hardly get my feet into the size that I wanted. They look like little balloons. It looks ridiculous. The theme of the week has been swollen feet. Even my doctor noticed the state of these little suckers!! Oh well J

This weekend was my friend’s birthday. She had a little shin dig at her mom’s house. One of her friends is due June 28^th and I am due June 27^th. She and I chatted it up all night about different pregnancy stuff. She is planning on not doing an epidural. They will be using the Bradey Method, which is what my doctor has recommended. I wish we had considered this earlier because I don’t know if we will be prepped enough for the labor. She and her husband took a 12 week class on it. So we’ll see how this goes. I’m just going to go in with an open mind. If I need the epidural than I need it but I am not going to ask for it until I really really need it. I want to test my strength first.

Saturday we had 8 hours of birthing classes to attend. I was thinking that it was going to be miserable to be in class that long but it actually wasn’t bad. They gave us lots of snacks, breaks, and an hour to go get lunch. The first half was really good information. They taught us all of the breathing techniques and different positions to relieve pain. I found that to be super useful. They also taught the dads how to massage mom’s back and hands. Eric was so cute. He was taking notes the whole time. I think he’s going to be really great in labor. I think he is just the type to be helpful through those contractions. From the sounds of it, you can’t go all natural without support like that. Hopefully we can get through it together. He also cracked some jokes that made the whole class laugh. What a silly little thing! Throughout the 1^st half they showed peoples birth stories on these short videos. The last one made me cry my eyes out. They went through the whole thing. When the baby was born I could hardly keep those little tears in my eyes. Thank goodness they sent us to lunch right after showing us to the video. I barely made it to the car before I was a mess. Seeing that movie just made me so emotional about the birth of a child. It’s just so amazing. Hopefully I can contain myself when little Grayson comes. I cried all the way to the restaurant. I’m a loser. These pregnancy hormones are a killer. We had lunch at a greek place and got a slice of Baklava. That is baby Grayson’s favorite treat now. Mmmmmmmm. So tasty! The 2^nd half of class I could have done without. They went over a lot of the medical things that are going to be done during an epidural. They even passed around all of the instruments, including an epidural needle…. I really didn’t need to see all of that. That only made me more nervous about getting one. To me, ignorance is bliss, on that subject at least. Too much information!

The rest of this week has been pretty uneventful. I have been slaving away on my diapers. I even take them to work and try and get some of them done on my lunch break. My goal is to have most of them done by Sunday so that I can relax all next week.

My hormones have really been a problem lately. I seriously get so agitated and pissed off sometimes that I am nearly in tears. Excluding the passing out spells I had in pregnancy, the hormones have been the worst part of pregnancy. Everything else is tolerable. I would rather pee 30 times a day than be grumpy all day. Its just ridiculous. Work is getting difficult because sometimes I feel like I’m surrounded by idiots when in actuality I’m probably just blowing things out of proportion. I just try to stay at my desk except for to pee and get lunch. That way, no one has to witness the rage of a pregnant person. I told Megan that I need an exorcism because there is a demon residing in my soul right now. Tuesday I was so pissed off at the gym I was near tears. I was hot, my pants were too tight, my shoes were too tight, and I really didn’t want to be there. I was on the bike, cycling in rage. I just want the old, non-grumpy Kayla back. Please? I try my hardest not to let my mood swings get out of control. I told myself and Eric I want no drama until the baby comes. We need to have a stress free household.

I can’t believe that the time is almost here. Now that week 37 is over we are entering the 2 weeks left stretch. It’s insane. For the next 2 weeks we are just going to be wrapping everything up.

 One thing Eric and I had talked about getting done was the birth announcements. Eric is thinking of making them since he is pretty computer savvy. Can you believe that we are talking about making birth announcements? Crazy. I don’t know if we’ll have time to before the baby but it would be nice to have them mostly ready – except for the picture of course. We are going to be super busy once he gets here.

I’ve also got to pack my hospital bag and choose an outfit for little Grayson to wear home. We did all of his laundry the other day. I haven’t folded it all yet, which is another thing on my list. That boy really has a lot of clothes. I don’t know how I’m going to choose an outfit for him to come home in. OMG!!! This is going to be un-real.

We put the car seat in the Prius. I still need to get a car seat base for my car. I can’t believe how much space those things take up. We ended up getting a carrier car seat (the typical kind) but I kinda wish we had gotten a convertible one instead just because it is taking up so much space. I got in the car after work the other day and it scared the crap out of me. I thought that someone was sitting in the back seat. Nope, just the baby seat.

There are just a couple more items I need to get like a baby sling carrier. I think I have everything I need for the diapers. We went into the diaper store and got the dirty diaper bags for home and for the daycare/travel/grandma’s house. They are super cute. We got the bags instead of pails because they are more convenient. The bag is heat sealed so the smell is not supposed to leak out. Who knows. I think we are just going to keep it in the laundry room because that is where the ferrets live and it already stinks in there. We won’t even notice! After we get the last few items I think we will be set.

Now we just have the waiting game. I have a doctor’s appointment tomorrow that I am really anxious for. He is going to do an exam so he might be able to tell me if I am effaced or dilated. I hope he discovers something so we have information for all of our travelers. Wish us luck!

Week 36

Major Developments: Baby is shedding the hair that covered his body as well as the waxy substance that protects the skin. All of this is swallowed and will be in his first poopy diaper. Gross baby Grayson! At the end of week 36, baby is considered full term

Size of Baby: Weight of Crenshaw melon and about 18.5 inches long

Week 36 is over!!! Man, things are really starting to get busy around here. It’s a little maddening.

Megan has been slaving since she got back on prep for the shower she is throwing with my Mom and Bre. On Friday the Thomas sisters got together and finished up the baked goods. Megan had already baked everything, we just had to decorate. I had left over cake from some cake pops I had made for someone’s birthday on Monday so we rolled those up and dipped them. The shower was “rain shower” themed (so cute) so the sugar cookies were in the shape of raindrops. They were frosted blue. We tried to get fancy with my icing piper on the cupcakes. Megan was much better at it than I was. We did them white with blue sparkle sprinkles. I really want to take a cake decorating class. I’m no good at the decorating part of baking; unless its cake pops, then I’m alright. I better snap to it so I can be ready for Grayson’s first birthday. Anyways, I digress.. We got all of that finished up and ready for the shower the next day. I have really been wanting to have a sugar cookie for the past week or so. I was super excited to finally have one.

Saturday the shower finally arrived. Everything was super cute. I went over early to set up and I almost died at the cuteness of everything. Megan had precious little signs for all of the food. She reused these adorable stipped straws from my Utah shower and put little rain clouds on them. So clever. Bre made white poofy things out of tissue paper which had little rain drops dangling from them.  Megan even made the cutest thank you signs and banners. I don’t have all of the pictures yet -  just two that Megan posted on Facebook. When I get the rest, I will post more pictures. It was seriously adorable! All of the food was really really healthy (just like this preggers) and then you got to the desert table and it all went down the drains. I had quite a few treats. I had held off on eating bad all week because I knew Megan was going to be baking up a storm. I guess it’s not bad to indulge once in a while right?

The shower itself went really well. We played the candy bar game & the game where everyone guesses my measurements. No one was allowed to say the word cute when I opened gifts too. At this point, Megan is going to be a professional at planning showers. She did really well! I got loaded up with lots of cute clothes, wash clothes, bath stuff, toys (one of which I kept referring to as a chew toy. LOL), diaper changing pads, and the most adorable handmade diaper bag. My friend has another friend who is having a baby and she received a bag similar to mine. She loved the bag so had the same lady make me one. It’s awesome and so comfortable. I also got 3 baby jumpers. You know the type that hangs from the doorway? It was hilarious. I couldn’t believe it. The whole registry thing has been very odd. It seems like Target is not very good at updating things that are bought. I spent a lot of time making sure that everything was always checked off to avoid getting duplicates. I guess if everyone goes shopping the same day it’s hard to control. Who knows. I think everyone had fun though. I know I did. I just get so overwhelmed with how generous people are. I feel guilty accepting so much. We have been given so many things as well as gift cards. We have hardly had to buy anything – excluding things for the room. I am very lucky to have such a great support system. Megan took me home from the shower and I just burst into tears. I’m just such an emotional wreck. I’m like “thanks for working so hard on the shower” (in a crying voice). Hahaha. Oh man…. I’m a mess!

That night, after the shower, I was seriously pooped. Making dinner did not sound like a good plan at all. Eric and I decided to go out for dinner. We are running out of time to have dinner dates before we are a family of three. We were so indecisive that it literally took us over 2 hours to decide on something. Nothing sounded good what so ever. Can you believe that? How many pregnant women can’t decide on what they want to eat. I’m a freak of nature. We went to Macaroni Grill and I ended up getting the most pregnant item on the list. A burger topped with fried mac & cheese. It was probably not the healthiest thing on the planet. When in Rome right? Just kidding. Afterwards we went to our favorite Gelato spot.  A middle aged man stopped us and was absolutely convinced that I am having a girl. They were told their son was a girl but it turned out to be a boy. He was really nice. He even said my ankles were looking good. I don’t usually heat that. I usually hear people say; wow your ankles are swollen today. I usually end up telling them, no they aren’t swollen, I just have cankles. He really freaked me out though. I mean, I know I’m not having a girl. I have several pictures and recordings with the proof. I just started freaking out thinking OMG, what would I do? How can you change your way of thinking so quickly when you end up having something that you were told you weren’t having. And all of the cute clothes people have already given you. What a mess that would be. I’ve already programmed my mind about little Grayson. I think I would have a hard time adjusting that! I would go into shock! But let’s not get ahead of ourselves. That’s not going to be happening! Little baby Grayson will be here before we know it.

My cloth diaper making process is finally off the ground. Sunday I spent a good portion of the day tracing all of my diaper patterns onto my fabric. The bolts that diaper fabric comes off are a lot larger than regular fabric. I can’t remember how wide they are but they are huge pieces of fabric. I have to lay them out on my living room floor because my sewing table is too small. I need a sewing room like my Grandman Frandsen’s. One day…. For now, I’ll just keep dreaming.  My diaper covers are going to be a one size diaper that fit through infancy through potty training, so hopefully I only have to do this once. The first one I made seemed huge. I ended up cutting down one of my patterns to make a smaller diaper. It took me a good 3 hours to trace out my pattern on 2 of my fabric cuts. You really have tot plan how to lay everything out to get the most out of the fabric. I think I did a dang good job. I was able to get 7 covers and most of its extra pieces out of a yard of fabric…if I remember right. The pieces that don’t fit on my yard I’m cutting out of a white piece of diaper fabric that I decided to use on the inside instead of the outside. My covers are going to be yellow, dinosaur print, and owl print. Poor little Grayson was getting all smooshed while I was tracing. I didn’t finish my largest piece of fabric tracing. I thought I’d give little Grayson’s head a break from being all jammed up from me bending over. I had about 14 diaper covers cut out by the end of Sunday night. Man, was my body sore the next day! Butt, legs, arms, back.. all sore; too much bending. I’m glad I’m mostly done with that part of it. I think tracing the pattern is going to be the most time consuming part.

Daycare is something that I’ve been thinking a lot about lately. Baby Grayson will not need to be in daycare until late August but I want to get a spot reserved ASAP. I like to have a plan for everything. I also didn’t want to have to choose inferior care because I waited too long to pick a provider.  Monday we had a daycare to interview. It was another home daycare, which is really what we are looking for. We don’t want to send our baby to a daycare center, like tutor time or something, because I think he needs more of the hands on personal care for now. I probably send him to a daycare center and take him out of home daycare when it is time for him to be doing preschool. Initially, I was super impressed with the couple we were interviewing. They sent us over a huge packet of information on their daycare and policies. The other thing I really was impressed with was the fact that this couple provided so many tips on home day care. They gave un biased information on what we should be looking for in a provider. The daycare is called Gee Wiz and they live right across the street from our neighborhood.  It is run by a couple who has 7 children of their own. They are fairly young – maybe 5 or 7 years older than Eric. I doubt that either of them are in their 40’s. I like that about them. They really really seem to love children. 3 or 4 of their kids are school aged so they will not be at the day care. Their license with the state allows them to take 10 kids a day, but they don’t take a full 10 kids. They take only 2 infants and the rest are older. They like to monitor the age groups they take in so that the daycare can run smoothly. One thing I liked about this daycare over the last one we interviewed is the house has an open floor plan. Each age group has its own little section and everyone has their own crib. They have a million things for the kids to do as well. The last lady we interviewed had a lot of toys but the infants were kept in her family room and all of the other ages had little bedrooms. I found it hard to understand how she’d keep an eye on everyone if they were all sectioned off into different parts of the house. Gee Wiz does not have a pool, which is a plus for me – the last lady had one. They also don’t have any cats and the last lady had one. She also had a bar in the house which made me a little nervous. I mean obviously the kids wouldn’t have access to the alcohol but it would be scary to think they might sneak off and climb on the barstools and fall or hit their head on a bottle. Who knows. The couple at Gee Wiz were super up front about everything. They seem like truly honest people. They explained everything that goes on in a day. They have even mentioned that most of the kids that come from their daycare have had the option of skipping kindergarten. They have a lot of activities throughout the day and everything is very structured. I really feel like we clicked better with the couple at Gee Wiz. I got a really good feeling about them, and so did Eric. I liked the last lady, but I didn’t walk out of her house thinking, wow, I really really like her. The only extra positive thing about the last lady is that a coworker takes her baby there. I know that she’s good at what she does but it just seems like she does it because she’s a stay at home mom and it gives her something to do. Her kids are fully grown. The people at Gee Wiz have a home daycare because it’s truly what they love to do. I’m excited to be signing up for a spot this week with Gee Wiz. That is one more thing off of the list!!

Because I met with the Daycare people on Monday and was just freaking pooped the rest of the night, I wasn’t able to start sewing my diaper covers until Tuesday. I had planned to sew a little each night because I want these bad boys finished. After they are finished, Grayson is welcome to come any time he wants. So Tuesday night I decided to make one start to finish. I had originally planned to do them in an assembly line, but I wanted to make sure everything was going to work first. Now that I have the proper elastic (which I bought a whole box of at Joann’s – The people probably thought I was crazy) I was finally able to finish a cover that actually looked professional. It took me the whole evening to get it right but it was finally done. You have no clue how ecstatic I was; partly because I was happy that I wasn’t pissed off and in a bad mood and partly because the cover was just so dang cute! I am now confident that I can get all of these covers done and sewn correctly. I also bought my diaper inserts on Monday so I was able to put the whole thing together. The insert really helped me understand what adjustments needed to be made. The cover seems so dang comfortable. Its like a little cushion for his little bum. I also got the leg gussets under control so we should not have as many leaks. I actually heard somewhere that cloth diapered babies have less blow outs than disposable. I’m starting to see why. Plastic diapers are so thin and flimsy. Cloth diapers really seem absorbent. I can’t wait to try it out. The first one I made was with the yellow fabric, which I love, but I’m dying to make the dinosaurs and owls. They are seriously going to be precious! I have one picture of the cover below but I promise I will post more of the inside and outsides of the others so you can all see how they work. They are marvelous!

Yesterday Eric and I attended our first pregnancy class. This one was a class called the Art of Breastfeeding. I found it to be extremely helpful and full of information. There was so much to learn that I would have had no clue about had I not attended the class. If you ever know anyone debating on taking the class or not, I’d say take it. You learn so much on the proper way to get your baby to latch on and how to avoid a painful mess. I know a lot of people aren’t too gung-ho on breastfeeding. It seems like if you don’t know the right way to fix a problem you are having I can see it being frustrating and easier to quit. This class gave us so much information on how to fix common problems with breastfeeding. As long as my baby figures out the whole breastfeeding thing, I would like to breastfeed him as long as my body will allow me to. Obviously, I’m not going to have a 3 year old dangling out of my shirt, but I’d like to breastfeed for at least the first year. If he starts to get too big, I’m planning on pumping and bottle feeding. To me, the important thing is that he is eating breast milk and not formula. I took an infancy class in college and learned so much about the benefits of breastmilk. I know that he will come out fine either way but my plan and goal is to breastfeed. I was not breastfed and I didn’t self-destruct. I really like the idea of breastfeeding for the bonding and personal time you get with baby.  I guess when it’s time to start the solid foods, we’ll see how things work out. I have been hearing about making baby food from home and adding a little breast milk to the food. My doctor recommended it and said it’s a really good way to make sure that your baby is getting food without all that extra crap without having to go “organic”. I’m just going to take this day by day but I’m really excited to try it out. I’m a little worried about the pump I bought. I might exchange it for the other one that I was researching. The instructor of the class didn’t know much about the one I bought but the other one I researched she knew a lot about. I guess it just varies for each person. We’ll see!

So I have a child birthing class on Saturday. I’m really excited about it because I really want to learn more about the epidural process. I have been doing a lot of thinking about that lately. Going into pregnancy, I was all for the epidural. I have noticed that a lot of my opinions have changed since getting further into my pregnancy. I have been considered going without an epidural in the last couple months. I’m not sure what my tolerance for pain is. I know I’m pretty wussy, but I would at least like to try. I am hoping to go into the labor process with an open mind. If I can’t handle it, then I’ll do the epidural. If I can, I’ll go without. I have been trying to prep myself so that I can go into this calm and peaceful. I really don’t want to be the crazy lady that scares all of the other women in delivery or the lady that kills her husband in labor. I know that a lot of people are thinking I’m crazy. Everyone I talk to is really opinionated about the epidural. It’s kind of driving me insane. I just want to experience it for myself and make that decision on my own without anyone else’s opinions. And whatever decision I make, I hope for real support not comments from the peanut gallery.  Sometimes I think that people think just because I’m a first time mom I don’t know anything and I can’t make educated decisions on my own. Some people have advised asking for the epidural as soon as the doors open to the hospital. I have even had people tell me their doctors advised them to do that. I think that is pretty sad. I really don’t want to be numb the whole time. I have heard with the epidural that you are completely numb and don’t feel your baby coming out. How are you supposed to work with your baby if you can’t feel anything? I’m looking forward to labor in some ways. I’m not looking forward to the worst pain of my life but I think it will be worth it. I just really need to research and come to a conclusion. My doctor has given us a lot of options on pain management. One Eric and I are going to look into is called the Bradley Method. This is where the husband acts as a labor coach basically and you get through it together. I think it sounds really nice and positive. I’ll let you know more about it next week. Sorry for the pregnancy rant!

So much is happening lately it’s hard to keep up with it all. My out of state family is really concerned about making it here for the birth. Unfortunately, we have no clue when baby will get here. I’m ready when baby is ready. I don’t want to rush him. He can come when he his ready. Just not the 4^th of July. My cube mate at work asked me the other day what the most annoying question I get asked it. I didn’t really have an answer for her at first. It used to to be questioning about the name situation. I think the most annoying question I get now is “So are you ready for this to be over”. I really am starting to wonder why people are always so negative about the end of pregnancy and why they are so antsy to get it over with it. My pregnancy has been one of the best things ever. I have enjoyed it thoroughly. I’m not particularly anxious about “getting it over”. That just sounds awful. I have been very fortunate to have a healthy uncomplicated pregnancy. To me, pregnancy is what you make it. Of course there will always be people that have had health problems that have made them legitimately miserable. I just feel like all of the uncomfortable things in pregnancy shouldn’t be made out to be more than they are as long as you are healthy. Of course I am uncomfortable when I’m hot and grumpy. Yes, it is difficult to bend over and get up from sitting.  And YES I’m sick and tired of peeing a thousand times a day. I try not to complain too much because those are all insignificant problems. (Eric is probably reading this and thinking, what planet is she living on? All I hear is complaints). So when people say, are you ready to get this over with I get annoyed. People should celebrate their pregnancy instead of count the days until it is over with dread.  Another pregnancy rant. I’m allowed 2 a blog entry right? I’ve hit my limit. Dang.

Health wise I’m doing well. My Braxton hicks contractions are coming more often now. They are uncomfortable but not painful more than a couple times a day. Its really freaky to see how hard and lumpy my belly gets! Very interesting.  My nails are growing like crazy. I want to get one of those long lasting manicures before the baby comes so I can have nice nails. I’m just afraid to go get it because my nails are growing like weeds. In other news, I have yet to see a stretch mark!! I keep worrying that I’ll see them all when the bump is gone. I’m keeping up with keeping the bump moisturized. It’s really cute because little baby Grayson wakes up every time I start rubbing my belly with lotion. He’s a cute little guy. I’ve been having weird dreams lately too. More stressful dreams about labor and problems with the baby’s health during labor. I think it’s just nerves about the labor process.

Any hoot. I’ve been going on for a while now. I have pictures from the maternity shoot. I’ve included them below. I didn’t post the pictures of the nursery. I’m going to post them in another blog with all of the info on where I found everything. The pictures are courtesy of Meg Brooke Photography. She did a fantastic job. I’m lucky to have a photographer for a sister. 

Week 35

Major Developments: The kidney's are fully developed & the liver can process some waste products. Basic physical development is mostly complete, baby just has to work on fattening up. My uterus is now reaching to my ribs

Size of baby: Weight of honeydew mellon and over 18 inches long.

Week 35 gave the Silva's a long weekend due to memorial day. It was nice to have an extra day off from work.

We had planned on taking Eric's dad to the Grand Canyon on Saturday. For some reason, Friday I was absolutely exhausted so I fell asleep at about 9 pm. wow.... what a loser. he he. Saturday we woke up bright and early, picked up Tulilo, and went to breakfast before heading up to the canyon. I made up a lot sleep on the way up and the way back. For some strange reason, we had a cold front come into town. That meant that Phoenix was about mid 80's and the Grand Canyon was about 60. Eric and Tulio were freezing. I was in a tank top and comfortable for a bit. I eventually put on a light jacket but was not cold at all. I was the only idiot in a tank top. These baby sure is keeping me warm. I'm really happy that it wasn't hot. I wouldn't have made it through the trip if it was above 90. We walked around, saw the canyon, and then headed back home. It was a long day, but baby got to visit one of the 7 wonders of the world. Here he is:

 

Sunday I had dedicated to sewing diaper covers. I ended up going to lunch with Megan and spending quite a while there. We kept talking about our little baby Grayson and all the cool things that were going to be happening. She said maybe the next lunch date we have will be with the little baby. Eeek! I can't believe we are getting so close! After lunch I went home to do my diaper covers. I spent a lot of time planning how to best use my fabric. I had already started a bit on a cover so I thought I had a head start. WRONG! I went through all of the steps on my tutorial. I thought it was looking good until I was just about finished.

I got the dumb thing sewn together and looked at it thinking it looked way too wide!! Something was also wrong with the inside. I felt like I could wear it. My snaps were covered which was preventing me from fastening them. I was getting extremely frustrated trying to figure out where I went wrong. Eric was trying to calm me down but it just wasn't helping. Finally before going to bed I tried to research where to buy a diaper cover in store so I could compare. There was only one store in the great state of AZ that I could find that had that had them physically in the store. I was so sad because I wouldn't be able to go until Tuesday due to the holiday. I went to bed in tears. Those dang hormones make me so incredibly mad that I just burst into tears. Half because I'm so pissed and half because I'm mad that I'm so pissed. It seems the only way to get rid of the fury is to cry. These hormones are an awful awful thing.

I decided I was not going to ruin my Monday holiday so I didn't work on my diapers. We had some friends over for a pool party/bbq. I have been dying to go swimming to see how it feels preggers. I kept joking to take bets on if I would float or sink. Much to my dismay, I did not float. I was nervous to swim around too much just in case I did something to bother the baby. Thank goodness my community has bathrooms at the swimming pool. I had to pee soooo bad while I was in the pool. It was ridiculous how many times I had to get out to use the bathroom. I'm not too sure what that was about. Over all it was a nice day away from the office!!

Tuesday I went to the diaper store after work, which is called Zoolikins. This place was absolutely heavenly. The owner of the shop gave me and a few other girls a complete tutorial on everything and anything we would even need to know about cloth diapers. She was marvelous. I wish I had found the store earlier because I would have saved myself a lot of frustration while searching online for the diapering method that best fit my needs. She had a million different types of diaper covers and accessories. She also helped me out with picking out detergent. She knew I was a sew from home mom so she gave me a lot of advice on what I would want in my diaper covers. She had a diaper that looked just like mine at home but I actually wanted to buy a diaper cover with leg gussets. These little things help from having blow outs. I actually found out that there are less blow outs with cloth diapers than disposables. Interesting! I walked away from the store feeling 100 times more educated. This lady made it seem way more sane that I could ever rationalize it. Apparently, cloth diapering mothers are referred to as granola mothers. I don't know if this is a way of just calling us hippies. I wish that every person who has ever had something negative to say to me about cloth diapers could have been with me. People really need to be educated on the way things are done now with cloth diapering. I feel like so many more people would be open to the idea. They even have these little biodegradable linners that look like wipes that can be put in a cloth diaper and flushed for those who are still hanging on to the whole disposable thing. There are lots of gadgets to help with cleaning and such. Its just such a wonderful thing. I'm sure all you cloth diaper haters are still thinking, "Just wait until you get into this Kayla, you are going to hate it". I really don't think I will. This is something that I am so passionate about that even if it was a pain, I would still continue it. I will not contribute to the landfill crisis going on these days. Especially when it means each diaper I throw away will sit there for 500 years. Not going to happen. I just wish people were more positive about my little adventure. I'm sorry to say it, but I'm getting sick of the negative comments!! Arrrrg!!! I will cloth diaper and smile through the whole thing knowing I made a very small difference.

So this is the cover I bought:

and these are the lovely leg gussets I want to add to my diapers:

By time I got home, I had figured out what I did wrong with the width and snaps. My diaper was wider than the one I bought so I had a reference of how small it should be. These diapers are adjustable with the snaps so that they can be worn as newborns through the toddler years. I was concerned with mine being to big for an infant. I took mine apart and re-sewed. I guessed around with the sizing on the leg gussets. The elastic I used was not working out very well which was frustrating me to no end. I ended up in the same position I was in on Sunday night. In tears. I had solved most of the problems but couldn't get the dang gusset thing down. I gave up for the night. Defeated. Ugh.

Wednesday, I had a doctors appointment bright and early. We had to make this one a quick one because Eric had a class to take at 9 for work. Dr. Guzman noticed that I wasn't quite as chipper as I usually am. I told him I've been having major hormone problems. Of course, he said this is normal but I don't get a free pass to be a brat either. hehe. Silly guy. I told him that Eric keeps asking why I'm so grumpy. Silly question to ask a preggers right? Guzman agreed. He started listing off a whole series of problems I'm probably having that just might be contributing to my foul moods. Poor Eric. I know he's sympathetic but men will never fully understand. I wish they could experience this whole thing too. No offense Eric :) Everything is seeming healthy. He checked to see that the baby was still head down, which he is. Next week, he might order an ultrasound just to verify. Cross our fingers he does. I want to see baby. I asked how soon after my due date he'll induce me if I go over. I though you could just pick a date but I guess I have to be a certain percent effaced, which basically is the ripening of my cervix. Booo. I wanted to pick a date. Well kinda. It is convenient for getting family here in time but I don't know if I could deal with the anxiety of knowing when baby was coming. I think I'd rather be surprised. I can't imagine how sleepless and anxious I would be the night before knowing I was being induced. I have a feeling I will go over my date and have to be induced. I guess we'll see right? I have weekly appointments from here on out. Hopefully we'll get a little more info each week. 

Eric also had his final gallstone procedure done on Wed. He had the remaining stones that were outside the gallbladder removed through an endoscopy. It was about a 45 min procedure. Man, he was so dang drugged up. It was pretty funny. He was also like a broken record with the question asking. Those nurses in recovery must be very patient people!! He is happy to be done, and so am I. Poor guy has lost so much weight during this whole process. He's going to blow away in the wind. Aren't men supposed to gain sympathy weight? Rude guy! 

Pre surgery:

 The very obvious post surgery haze:

While Eric was in surgery I ran over to Joann's because I had a breakthrough. I decided the elastic I was using was way too stiff for my diapers. I bought some fold over elastic, which saved my life. I took my whole diaper apart and sewed with the fold over elastic. Presto - the leg gussets work and so do the leg openings. The width looks pretty good too. Now that I have everything in order, I can start busting those things out. I was so relieved. I was so proud! Ahhhhh. It was amazing. This is my diaper cover. Its not a good picture and it looks all rumply, but it is very similar to the diaper cover I bought from Zoolikins. No more tears over the diapers!!!

 

I think that nesting is starting to kick in a little. I have been wanting to clean things a lot lately. I did some cleaning over the weekend but not nearly as much as I want to. I can't wait until I can clean, post pregnancy. I would love to scrub every surface in this house. Its a freaking mess! My room looks like a dang war zone. It is serving as my sewing room so it is a disaster in there. I'm going crazy. My tile is filthy. It doesn't matter how many times I mop, that dang grout still looks nasty. I despise tile with a fiery hatred. I've been dying to clean my doors and floor boards, which I usually do every month. I haven't been able to do that for a couple months because of the bending. The last time I did it, I nearly slept for a century. A lot of the monthly cleaning things I do get done when Eric is away from the house because of his allergies. The minute I start cleaning he starts to have an allergy attack. So there are only a few days a month that I can get my deep cleaning items done. The poor house hasn't been dusted for a while either, which is a total no-no when Eric is home. I just want to clean!!! I just want a clean house!! I just want my sewing projects to stop taking over the house!!

Something else I have noticed is that it would be really awesome to have a belly cut out at my work desk. That straight desk is really starting to get in the way of my belly. He he. Yes, Boss, I'd like the maternity desk. Pronto. Silly!

I'm still feeling pretty good other than the hormones. They are seriously out of hand. I get so angry at everything. Especially when I am hot, which is always. I burst into tears at my desk today. It was pathetic. I was feeling discouraged because a lot of people are declining for the shower Megan and Bre are throwing. I couldn't control it. Usually, I would just brush it off but the hormones are taking over here too. Eric kept saying well we've already gotten enough gifts, don't worry about it. Again, male brain does not process pregnancy hormones. I could cry at the death of a fly at this point. I'm so dang emotinal.  I'm also starting to have Braxton Hicks contractions that are actually noticeable now. My belly gets all hard and and I get a lot of pressure. I have only had two that were actually painful. They only lasted for 30 seconds but took my breath away. Very interesting. I was telling my cube partner that I feel lucky to only having small problems like hormones, not being able to sleep, and being hot. Thank goodness that is the extent of my pregnancy discomfort.

Now that week 35 is over, we are entering the 4 weeks away zone. This little baby will be here before we know it. I cannot wait. I'm scared but excited at the same time. I have been having some pretty awful and disturbing dreams about labor. I guess I'm really nervous about that. I just can't believe I'll be in that hospital bed with a little tiny baby in 4 weeks. Its going to be amazing. As a closing note, I got baby Grayson a little gift that should be a hint for him. This shirt tells him when I want him here. BEFORE THE 4TH OF JULY. That little guy better get here before then!! He has to wear this little shirt!

You hear that Grayson? Before the 4th!!